A Chinese Scavenger Hunt/ Relay Race

Yesterday I had to go get a physical in order to apply for a new visa. For some of you, I need not say more, but for everyone else, I will elaborate. I arrived at the clinic, and they gave me a list of tests that I had to have done. Thankfully, I had a Chinese woman there with me to help me navigate the clinic because even though most of the people there spoke at least minimal English no one told me where to go. So my new friend took me to the first room, and I had to have an ultrasound done. When the lady was finished, I just lay on the bed looking like an idiot because I did not realize that she was finished. Eventually, I got the idea and scooted off to the next room. 

You see this was not like in the US where you have several tests done in one room. I mean you might have to go to a lab to get blood work done, but someone at least directs you to those places. Next I went to another room to get an EKG. Then another room to get my blood pressure, my weight, and my height checked. Between each room we ran as if we were hoping to win some sort of prize for finishing the test first. However, it was also like a scavenger hunt because no one told us where to go next, we just ran from room to room hoping to find the next hidden treasure (or medical test, whichever you prefer). 

After the blood pressure room, came my favorite room of all: the blood work room. They took my blood, which was not so unusual, but when they were done they put a q-tip (outside of the US more commonly known as a cotton swab) on the spot and told me to fold my arm to keep it in place. All the while, I had to continue sprinting for the prize by giving a urine sample. Let’s just say that the q-tip did not stay in place nor did it do a very good job of stopping the bleeding. In the US if you get blood work done they put a cotton ball on your arm and they tape it in place (or they at least give you a Band-Aid, aka an adhesive bandage). So there I am bleeding all over the place (ok, this might a bit of an exaggeration, but I did get some blood on the floor), and none of the nurses noticed. The Chinese woman who was helping me out looked as if she might faint at the sight of my blood, but she got me a Kleenex, tissue, and helped clean the blood off the floor. 

As I mentioned before, next was the urine sample, I will spare you the details, but I was given a tiny, flimsy plastic cup. Then I had to carry this little cup  to the urine test lab which was right across the hall, but it kinda grossed me out. They put a test strip in it and then I was told to throw away the cup in a trashcan full of other people’s urine cups. I would like to take this moment to say that I am very glad that I am not the person who had to empty that trash can. 

Lastly, we went to the x-ray room. One thing that was very interesting about this whole experience was that there was NO privacy as we were racing for the prize; we would go to various rooms, open the door and hope that they were not occupied. The same was true for the x-ray room. I would think that it could be dangerous for an unsuspecting person to simply walk into an x-ray room, but considering that they did not have any sort of protection for the person who was getting the x-ray (aren’t you supposed to wear a lead vest?), I don’t think that they were too concerned about it. Maybe it was not really an x-ray but some other machine that did something similar, or maybe the machine had some sort of built in protection, but it made me a little nervous. 

At last I had finished the race; I turned in my score sheet and received another piece of paper. I am not entirely certain what it said, but my Chinese friend said that she would take care of it. I had conquered the physical.

From this experience, I have realized a few things. 1) People in the US are very concerned about bedside manner, but when you live in a country with over a billion people, you don’t have time to care about such things. They also don’t have time to hold your hand and walk you to the next test room. Efficiency is far more important. 2) From this I also can see that as an American, I can be too uptight about these things. Doctors in the US are too afraid of being sued, and therefore, Americans are coddled when they could take care of themselves. 3) I did not think about this last one until I was actually writing this post, but we have many brand name items that have become synonymous with the item itself. While I do not think that this is a very significant observation, I do find it interesting. If you want in reading about such products here is a link: http://robdkelly.com/blog/marketing/top-100-synonymous-genericized-brands/